Sunday, June 9, 2013
Sunday, September 26, 2010
September 2010 photos
Well, I promised to be real about this process. And photos don't lie. These were taken the first week of the program (4 weeks ago). It will be my goal to post new photos every month. These will cover September so you won't have to wait long for new pics in October.
I have lots to write about having nearly completed my first month of the program, but that will have to wait for a time when I'm not falling asleep at the keyboard.
If this isn't motivation, I don't know what is! Starting weight: 223 pounds.
I have lots to write about having nearly completed my first month of the program, but that will have to wait for a time when I'm not falling asleep at the keyboard.
If this isn't motivation, I don't know what is! Starting weight: 223 pounds.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
gotta start somewhere...
This past week was one of preparation. I finished meeting the other members of my "go team," took some basic tests, and repeated my mantra of the week.
This mantra idea came from my first Spiritual Sunday. Over the summer, I decided I don't need a church, fellowship, congregation or spiritual leader to tell me how to focus inward, slow down, and listen to what my Higher Power has in store for me. I just need to take the time to breathe, reflect, and listen. I realized there is no "right way to pray" and so, my wife and I have begun what I hope to be a reoccurring ritual.
Light a candle... let Spirit in.
Light some incense... hold some space.
Sound the gong... quiet my mind.
Then we each pull a card from the Motherpeace Tarot deck to guide and support us through the week. Last Sunday, two cards "jumped out" and wow, did I need both of these cards this week.
III. The Empress: the Earth Mother, nuturing, suppotive, receptive, relaxed, bounty.
[pushed right] Going after something. Concentrate beyond the struggle. Pay attention.
and
9 of Cups: gratitute, joy, wishing, desire.
[pulled slightly left] anxious. nervous about pursuing a goal.
After reading and learning more about what these two abundant cards had to say to me, I turned into a puddle of tears and relief. I have every right to wish and dream and desire something more. And I have all the resources, support, and wherewithal to get it done. Out of that came my first mantra. I pushed out through the tears:
"I will feel the LOVE that surrounds me."
=
On Tuesday morning, I met with my trainer (whom I've nick-named "the Guru") for testing.
First was the RMR test--to determine my Resting Metabolic Rate. My RMR tells me how many calories I burn while resting and not exerting myself in any way. With this information, factoring in daily activities as well as exercise sessions, my total daily calories can be precisely determined. That number is then adjusted depending on my goals: fewer than that number of calories to loose weight, more to gain muscle.
To begin, the Guru put probes on my ankle and near my knee. I learned later that these calculated my percentage of body fat. Then, he put a breathing mask over my mouth and nose. The mask was connected to a monitor. I was given a sheet to cover up with and left in a dim room to relax and breathe. I was told not to think about work or family or anything stressful. "Just put yourself on a warm beach somewhere." The monitor was noisy and it was hard not to control the beeping and ticking with each inhale and exhale. Apparently, I did well, only needing five of the 10-15 minutes the Guru allotted to collect enough data.
Next came the treadmill. The CMT--Cardio-Respiratory Metabolic Fitness Test--determines how many calories I burn at specific heart rates, the rate where I burn fat most efficiently, and if I am working out too intensely for my current fitness status. With this information, I can determine how long and at what heart rate I should be working at to meet my goals.
I was introduced to another trainer who appears to be the Guru's protege. He was an older gentleman who seemed to know a lot about fitness, but was intimidated by all of the Guru's technology. The Guru walked both of us through the process of gathering data for the CMT. Wear this heart monitor around your chest. Hook up the breathing mask to another monitor. Start by walking slowly on the treadmill to warm up. While warming up, the Guru explained to his protege how to administer the test. The protege echoed the instructions to me.
"Tell the patient the test will run for 10 minutes. Each minute, you will increase the incline on the treadmill. If the patient is comfortable, she should give a thumbs up. If it's uncomfortable, waver your hand back and forth. If you need to stop at any point, just give a thumbs down and we'll quit."
I'm not sure who was more nervous--me or the protege. But I gave a thumbs up and off we went. I tried not to pay much attention to all the mumbo-jumbo from the Guru about what the monitor was showing to his protege. The constant "how does that look?" and "what do you suppose this is telling us?" just made me feel like I was doing something wrong. But how could I be? I was just walking and breathing.
As promised, I was asked to check in every minute. "Can I increase the incline?" Thumbs up. "How are you doing?" Thumbs up. "A little faster now, okay?" Thumbs up. Hmm! I was doing pretty good! Then, came the seventh minute. It was the first time my hand wavered in response the frequent check-ins. I could feel my calves burning and my breathing was getting heavy. Small beads of sweat came running down my temples and onto the face mask that was fastened above my ears.
"Look at that!" exclaimed the Guru, pointing to the monitor screen. "Perfect, just perfect. Put her up to the next level." The protege began to reach for the "up" button but the Guru butted in--"Did you check in with the patient?"
"I'm going to put you up another level" and before I could give a hand sign, he moved me up. "Doing okay?" I wavered. "You're doing great. Almost there," the Guru assured me. "Everything is looking really good." The next two levels seemed longer than the first eight, but both of them seemed pleased with my "performance."
"That was a perfect test." The Guru told his protege that I was a perfect example of what the results should look like. I was instructed to get some water and eat a snack, then meet in the back room to go over the results. I stepped off the treadmill with my jelly-legs, staggered over to my bag, and thought to myself--"that wasn't that bad. I didn't even have to run!"
I'll get to all the results later. But let's just take a moment here to focus on the fact that I completed my first test--"perfectly." I was really feeling good and open and ready to go.
Before I left on Tuesday, I checked in with the physical therapist. And because I'm not old and decrepit, she gave me a few stretches to do for my plantar fasciitis and some balance exercises for my ankles and I was off. Looks like I won't be seeing much of the PT.
=
Wednesday was my last pre-program appointment and the one I dreaded most--the dietitian. Looking over my results she said, "okay, well our first goal will be to work on your Body fat." No shit lady... tell me something I don't already know. I could feel my resentment burning in the pit of my stomach.
My body is made up of 39% fat. I immediately rounded up and wondered what someone who was 40% fat could actually "work on." I'm just a big tub of lard with a "well below average" metabolism who is bound to be fat for the rest of her life!
Luckily, the dietitian turned out to be my favorite member of my "go team." She was kinda quirky but genuine in every way. She gave me a food plan complete with a few "freebies so you don't starve!" Nice. I hate the part where someone tells you what to eat. But everything made so much sense, it was hard to disagree.
I guess we'll have to see how it all pans out when I start my food plan and my fitness classes--and my first day back at school with the kids--TOMORROW!
This mantra idea came from my first Spiritual Sunday. Over the summer, I decided I don't need a church, fellowship, congregation or spiritual leader to tell me how to focus inward, slow down, and listen to what my Higher Power has in store for me. I just need to take the time to breathe, reflect, and listen. I realized there is no "right way to pray" and so, my wife and I have begun what I hope to be a reoccurring ritual.
Light a candle... let Spirit in.
Light some incense... hold some space.
Sound the gong... quiet my mind.
Then we each pull a card from the Motherpeace Tarot deck to guide and support us through the week. Last Sunday, two cards "jumped out" and wow, did I need both of these cards this week.
III. The Empress: the Earth Mother, nuturing, suppotive, receptive, relaxed, bounty.
[pushed right] Going after something. Concentrate beyond the struggle. Pay attention.
and
9 of Cups: gratitute, joy, wishing, desire.
[pulled slightly left] anxious. nervous about pursuing a goal.
After reading and learning more about what these two abundant cards had to say to me, I turned into a puddle of tears and relief. I have every right to wish and dream and desire something more. And I have all the resources, support, and wherewithal to get it done. Out of that came my first mantra. I pushed out through the tears:
"I will feel the LOVE that surrounds me."
=
On Tuesday morning, I met with my trainer (whom I've nick-named "the Guru") for testing.
First was the RMR test--to determine my Resting Metabolic Rate. My RMR tells me how many calories I burn while resting and not exerting myself in any way. With this information, factoring in daily activities as well as exercise sessions, my total daily calories can be precisely determined. That number is then adjusted depending on my goals: fewer than that number of calories to loose weight, more to gain muscle.
To begin, the Guru put probes on my ankle and near my knee. I learned later that these calculated my percentage of body fat. Then, he put a breathing mask over my mouth and nose. The mask was connected to a monitor. I was given a sheet to cover up with and left in a dim room to relax and breathe. I was told not to think about work or family or anything stressful. "Just put yourself on a warm beach somewhere." The monitor was noisy and it was hard not to control the beeping and ticking with each inhale and exhale. Apparently, I did well, only needing five of the 10-15 minutes the Guru allotted to collect enough data.
Next came the treadmill. The CMT--Cardio-Respiratory Metabolic Fitness Test--determines how many calories I burn at specific heart rates, the rate where I burn fat most efficiently, and if I am working out too intensely for my current fitness status. With this information, I can determine how long and at what heart rate I should be working at to meet my goals.
I was introduced to another trainer who appears to be the Guru's protege. He was an older gentleman who seemed to know a lot about fitness, but was intimidated by all of the Guru's technology. The Guru walked both of us through the process of gathering data for the CMT. Wear this heart monitor around your chest. Hook up the breathing mask to another monitor. Start by walking slowly on the treadmill to warm up. While warming up, the Guru explained to his protege how to administer the test. The protege echoed the instructions to me.
"Tell the patient the test will run for 10 minutes. Each minute, you will increase the incline on the treadmill. If the patient is comfortable, she should give a thumbs up. If it's uncomfortable, waver your hand back and forth. If you need to stop at any point, just give a thumbs down and we'll quit."
I'm not sure who was more nervous--me or the protege. But I gave a thumbs up and off we went. I tried not to pay much attention to all the mumbo-jumbo from the Guru about what the monitor was showing to his protege. The constant "how does that look?" and "what do you suppose this is telling us?" just made me feel like I was doing something wrong. But how could I be? I was just walking and breathing.
As promised, I was asked to check in every minute. "Can I increase the incline?" Thumbs up. "How are you doing?" Thumbs up. "A little faster now, okay?" Thumbs up. Hmm! I was doing pretty good! Then, came the seventh minute. It was the first time my hand wavered in response the frequent check-ins. I could feel my calves burning and my breathing was getting heavy. Small beads of sweat came running down my temples and onto the face mask that was fastened above my ears.
"Look at that!" exclaimed the Guru, pointing to the monitor screen. "Perfect, just perfect. Put her up to the next level." The protege began to reach for the "up" button but the Guru butted in--"Did you check in with the patient?"
"I'm going to put you up another level" and before I could give a hand sign, he moved me up. "Doing okay?" I wavered. "You're doing great. Almost there," the Guru assured me. "Everything is looking really good." The next two levels seemed longer than the first eight, but both of them seemed pleased with my "performance."
"That was a perfect test." The Guru told his protege that I was a perfect example of what the results should look like. I was instructed to get some water and eat a snack, then meet in the back room to go over the results. I stepped off the treadmill with my jelly-legs, staggered over to my bag, and thought to myself--"that wasn't that bad. I didn't even have to run!"
I'll get to all the results later. But let's just take a moment here to focus on the fact that I completed my first test--"perfectly." I was really feeling good and open and ready to go.
Before I left on Tuesday, I checked in with the physical therapist. And because I'm not old and decrepit, she gave me a few stretches to do for my plantar fasciitis and some balance exercises for my ankles and I was off. Looks like I won't be seeing much of the PT.
=
Wednesday was my last pre-program appointment and the one I dreaded most--the dietitian. Looking over my results she said, "okay, well our first goal will be to work on your Body fat." No shit lady... tell me something I don't already know. I could feel my resentment burning in the pit of my stomach.
My body is made up of 39% fat. I immediately rounded up and wondered what someone who was 40% fat could actually "work on." I'm just a big tub of lard with a "well below average" metabolism who is bound to be fat for the rest of her life!
Luckily, the dietitian turned out to be my favorite member of my "go team." She was kinda quirky but genuine in every way. She gave me a food plan complete with a few "freebies so you don't starve!" Nice. I hate the part where someone tells you what to eat. But everything made so much sense, it was hard to disagree.
I guess we'll have to see how it all pans out when I start my food plan and my fitness classes--and my first day back at school with the kids--TOMORROW!
Monday, August 23, 2010
begin again.
"Haste makes waste." ...it's one of those silly phrases that I heard growing up and then went on to race through the rest of what I was doing. It wasn't until recently that I decided, at the ripe old age of 30, I no longer have extra time, money, or energy to squander. I have come to fully embrace this old-timey rhyming idiom in all its concise glory! From now on, whenever I do anything, I pledge to do it right--the first time.
Hence, I have spent the last several months making an important decision. I will participate in a two-year medical weight loss program. This is a commitment I am making to myself. Something I am doing for myself. But I have come to accept I cannot be successful by myself. And so I plan to use this blog as a way to reflect and let others in on my journey.
=
I know from experience that there is nothing "hasty" about loosing weight. From the program's website: "The only proven recipe for successful weight loss is permanent lifestyle changes." Starting September first, I will meet 5 days a week for the first 12 weeks with a team of the following medical professionals:
- Registered Dietitian
- Clinical Psychologist
- Physical Therapist
- Fitness Specialist
Today was my first for four one-on-one appointments--one with each member of what I have begun to refer to as my "Go Team." I spent an hour with the shrink going over my issues with weight. She asked about what attracted me to the program, wanted to know more about my adult weight history and my eating and sleeping habits. The rest was all the other typical shrink questions... "tell me about your family, your relationships, your job, your goals..." All of my responses will come up in future posts, I'm sure, but the main thing that really sank in today is:
this is all FOR ME.
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